Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Friday, March 14, 2014
Marie Antoinette and a Compass
My Monkee friend got in at 2am last night and it takes half an hour for you to ask where she is.
How come she's not here?
She is, she's still asleep.
T, can I tell you something?
Sure.
In the movie, Peabody and Sherman were traveling thru time. And there was this French lady who loved cake & told everyone to eat it.
HEY!! How come when I walk west the compass isn't pointing west?
How come she's not here?
She is, she's still asleep.
T, can I tell you something?
Sure.
In the movie, Peabody and Sherman were traveling thru time. And there was this French lady who loved cake & told everyone to eat it.
HEY!! How come when I walk west the compass isn't pointing west?
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Being Present
I am very lucky to be able to hang out with you every morning.
You've been great, reading Spanish into the computer every morning. Reading Spanish books, over and over.
It was so cold this morning that you told me stories of how the wind carried your friend into the street. Or when your ran around the yard during Hurricane Sandy. and you SAW the wind.
You changed your coat because it was too cold, we saw the wind blowing the trees outside. Like the branches were going to beat their way into the apartment.
It was in the 50's earlier this week, almost like spring. And next week, it's back to snow.
==
Two nights ago, I was very very sad. We went out for a dinner and a cabaret show. $200. And she likes to turn everything into a joke. When I said, twice, "My self confidence is shot, I feel like nobody ever listens," she treated it like a sitcom joke. "I think I know that woman over there," and "Look out the window at the crane!!" And then she spent the rest of the night talking about her ex-husband (who dumped her again) and her boyfriend (who she dumped).
Not the way to treat a friend.
Dawn, Scrumpy's Mom, suffers from the same form of narcissism.
However, I had a wonderful dinner with a friend from college last night. Spaghetti and conversation. Just being present.
It's important to feel, when you are with a friend, that you are the most interesting thing in the room.
(I wish that for you.)
You've been great, reading Spanish into the computer every morning. Reading Spanish books, over and over.
It was so cold this morning that you told me stories of how the wind carried your friend into the street. Or when your ran around the yard during Hurricane Sandy. and you SAW the wind.
You changed your coat because it was too cold, we saw the wind blowing the trees outside. Like the branches were going to beat their way into the apartment.
It was in the 50's earlier this week, almost like spring. And next week, it's back to snow.
==
Two nights ago, I was very very sad. We went out for a dinner and a cabaret show. $200. And she likes to turn everything into a joke. When I said, twice, "My self confidence is shot, I feel like nobody ever listens," she treated it like a sitcom joke. "I think I know that woman over there," and "Look out the window at the crane!!" And then she spent the rest of the night talking about her ex-husband (who dumped her again) and her boyfriend (who she dumped).
Not the way to treat a friend.
Dawn, Scrumpy's Mom, suffers from the same form of narcissism.
However, I had a wonderful dinner with a friend from college last night. Spaghetti and conversation. Just being present.
It's important to feel, when you are with a friend, that you are the most interesting thing in the room.
(I wish that for you.)
Friday, March 7, 2014
You got your package yesterday!!
Minecraft in real life!!
Like paper dolls or origami!
I gave you that hat!! You've used it for costumes a million times!
Cody has been keeping me company during the day, on the green couch. (The one that doesn't say ouch!)
8pm Bedtime!
You & I played with pipe cleaners, and you made a guy. I tried a magic trick with giraffes.
Your Dad brought 4 guys over to rehearse for a gig. So far, they played "Autumn Leaves", "White Room with Black Curtains" and "Give Me Something Good". All over the place, but really awesome.
This is how I had envisioned my time here.
For more than a month, I've been really sick with the flu, even coughing tonight a lot!! Ugh.
I installed my scroll project at the Hebrew Tabernacle yesterday. The best place for it, visually. Told your Mom. She just got cast in another show!! Playing the sheriff!
I only want to remember the music and Art!!
(You politely turned off the tv, Uncle Grandpa was on. And now I think I can hear you snoring. You didn't even turn on the crickets!!)
Like paper dolls or origami!
I gave you that hat!! You've used it for costumes a million times!
Cody has been keeping me company during the day, on the green couch. (The one that doesn't say ouch!)
8pm Bedtime!
You & I played with pipe cleaners, and you made a guy. I tried a magic trick with giraffes.
Your Dad brought 4 guys over to rehearse for a gig. So far, they played "Autumn Leaves", "White Room with Black Curtains" and "Give Me Something Good". All over the place, but really awesome.
This is how I had envisioned my time here.
For more than a month, I've been really sick with the flu, even coughing tonight a lot!! Ugh.
I installed my scroll project at the Hebrew Tabernacle yesterday. The best place for it, visually. Told your Mom. She just got cast in another show!! Playing the sheriff!
I only want to remember the music and Art!!
(You politely turned off the tv, Uncle Grandpa was on. And now I think I can hear you snoring. You didn't even turn on the crickets!!)
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
More Memories of Now
When we were at the Dentist, I let you play with my phone. I don't trust anyone, and barely trust you!! ;)
But I gave you full access.
And you opened up a note I had written when I was sad. Listing happy things. "Positive Side", it was called. "Em" was the first thing on the list. Maybe I write in code out of habit, you made a face but Poetry Night and Mousetraps were on the list too.
But I gave you full access.
And you opened up a note I had written when I was sad. Listing happy things. "Positive Side", it was called. "Em" was the first thing on the list. Maybe I write in code out of habit, you made a face but Poetry Night and Mousetraps were on the list too.
Monday, March 3, 2014
2nd Trip to The Dentist
Your father asked me to take you last week.
Today, at 1, he told me that instead of getting you at 181 & Ft Washington from the bus at 3:20/3:30, I had to pick you up at your school (204th!) at 2:50! I was in a seminar until 2:30 in Times Square, but I RUSHED up to get you. I had to ask around & got you from the office, where they said you had asked about your "Roommatch!".
I knew you had a bad gag reflex (and that you probably have a LOT of cavities, that's what they said last time! But your father was saying that maybe you don't have any. Doubtful, and getting your hopes up in a bad way.)
I tried to teach you "Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional," You picked up on the funny word "inevitable" as we crossed Broadway at 203rd st and got on the bus. Anticipating pain is worse than actually just experiencing it. I brought up stubbing your toe. You were probably scared before you did it the first time, but now it's not a big deal. Going to the dentist is bad, but for a very short time, and its worse if you fight the pain.
(Advice I need to listen to myself!)
It was bad, you couldn't even sit through the Xrays without *thinking* you were gonna gag. I tried to help you, but they had very little patience there (ironic bc we spent 1 hr waiting!!) She recommended a specialist who would put you under (your father said it was dangerous-I was on laughing gas when I was 8 & told you about my dream where the doctor turned into a space alien. You seemed to like that.)
Your dad came home and we were playing Jenga. (He asked for A immediately). We played one game, and then you/I/we built a fort, and we destroyed it. Repeatedly. Then you picked up your green water squirter and we chased each other around a bit. (FUN!) Then you played with your spinner. Then you tried jumping on my bed repeatedly, and if I pushed you with just the right force, you did a flip! (WAY FUN! You really seemed to be enjoying yourself!!)
And then Amber came into the hallway, and with her Schoolteacher-Mean voice, she told us to STOP what we were doing, because Cody was absolutely SHAKING from the noise. (Never mind that he was like that during the day and hasn't been doing well lately. Why does everyone here have a neurosis??) Now I feel grounded, or like I know what it is to have a brother that you get into trouble with! (The house has an eerie quiet about it now/lately. Like when there is NO laughter. Creepy. Like I'm leaving you with Lemony Snicket!!)
Today, at 1, he told me that instead of getting you at 181 & Ft Washington from the bus at 3:20/3:30, I had to pick you up at your school (204th!) at 2:50! I was in a seminar until 2:30 in Times Square, but I RUSHED up to get you. I had to ask around & got you from the office, where they said you had asked about your "Roommatch!".
I knew you had a bad gag reflex (and that you probably have a LOT of cavities, that's what they said last time! But your father was saying that maybe you don't have any. Doubtful, and getting your hopes up in a bad way.)
I tried to teach you "Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional," You picked up on the funny word "inevitable" as we crossed Broadway at 203rd st and got on the bus. Anticipating pain is worse than actually just experiencing it. I brought up stubbing your toe. You were probably scared before you did it the first time, but now it's not a big deal. Going to the dentist is bad, but for a very short time, and its worse if you fight the pain.
(Advice I need to listen to myself!)
It was bad, you couldn't even sit through the Xrays without *thinking* you were gonna gag. I tried to help you, but they had very little patience there (ironic bc we spent 1 hr waiting!!) She recommended a specialist who would put you under (your father said it was dangerous-I was on laughing gas when I was 8 & told you about my dream where the doctor turned into a space alien. You seemed to like that.)
Your dad came home and we were playing Jenga. (He asked for A immediately). We played one game, and then you/I/we built a fort, and we destroyed it. Repeatedly. Then you picked up your green water squirter and we chased each other around a bit. (FUN!) Then you played with your spinner. Then you tried jumping on my bed repeatedly, and if I pushed you with just the right force, you did a flip! (WAY FUN! You really seemed to be enjoying yourself!!)
And then Amber came into the hallway, and with her Schoolteacher-Mean voice, she told us to STOP what we were doing, because Cody was absolutely SHAKING from the noise. (Never mind that he was like that during the day and hasn't been doing well lately. Why does everyone here have a neurosis??) Now I feel grounded, or like I know what it is to have a brother that you get into trouble with! (The house has an eerie quiet about it now/lately. Like when there is NO laughter. Creepy. Like I'm leaving you with Lemony Snicket!!)
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